My first Christmas letter

Hello, Everyone!

I hope that this letter finds you in good health and good cheer.

First, a confession. For years, my Dad and I would point and laugh at the accumulation of Christmas letters we received. “How broad/impersonal/cheesy!” we would chortle. Well, in my accumulated (note I didn’t say OLD) age, I have seen the wisdom of such documents. I realize that I don’t get in touch with some of you nearly often enough, and this is a way to fill you in on what’s been happening.

To those who chose to convey their holiday wishes to our family in the form of a Christmas letter, I apologize and humbly beg your forgiveness. (I’m not sure if Dad has contemplated this)

(insert Act of Contrition here)

Please note that I have submitted this document electronically. If it would make this letter more seasonally appropriate, then, by all means, feel free to print it out on the festive holiday stationery of your choice. You will not hear from my attorney.

I probably should have started doing this last year – I was too fried from the special Congressional campaign I worked for to even contemplate such a task. Had I done so, I could have offered a breathless recitation of my international travels and political activities.

Alas, 2008 was quite different than 2007.

Don’t take this to mean that I have taken up a hermit-like existence in my den.

No, I’m not married yet.

This past summer, I provided photography services for the horse races at several county fairs in the area. As much as I enjoy the racing at the fairs, I was smitten by the opportunity to take a tax write-off for fair food. Apparently, I do a pretty decent job – five of the eight circuit champions chose my pictures to go on their trophy plaques. While the proceeds of this venture have not been sufficient to make early retirement to a tropical paradise feasible, I made a precious discovery – it is, indeed, possible to deep-fry a Pop Tart. I did five fairs in 2008, and hope to add at least one more in 2009.

I didn’t take any big, exotic vacations this year, unless you consider Columbus, Ohio an exotic destination. I took in 5 Columbus Crew games this year, enough to make up for the years I didn’t make it to any of their games. I even got to see Mr. Posh Spice (David Beckham) play. My presence must have done The Crew some good, as they are now champions of Major League Soccer. I will probably take in a similar number of their games next year, as I have purchased a partial season-ticket package. I hope to finally get in a trip to Montreal in 2009.

Once again, I was the PA announcer for the girls’ soccer games at Napoleon High School. Unfortunately, the LadyCats did not have a very successful season. We did have a German exchange student on the team, so I was able to get some German practice whenever she scored a goal. I didn’t take two semesters of German in college for nothing. I particularly enjoyed secretly replacing the team’s warm-up music with assorted hits from Neil Diamond, ABBA, and Drafi Deutscher. I’ll be adding the boys’ games to my schedule in 2009. Just my luck – the boys will be in a rebuilding year, because the “Golden Generation” that led the Wildcats to the state semi-finals in 2007, is graduating.

I learned one thing about politics in 2008 – a county commissioner’s race moves at a decidedly slower tempo than a special election for Congress. I assisted Robin Weirauch in her (sadly, unsuccessful) campaign for Henry County Commissioner. This came on the heels of a wild and wooly special election to replace our late Congressman, Paul Gillmor at the end of 2007. My future political activities will be focused on getting BBC Top Gear presenter (that’s British for “TV host”) Jeremy Clarkson named to the post of Auto Czar. Yes, he’s British, but better him than Ralph Nader, and Jay Leno’s tied to NBC for a while.


Merry Christmas, Frohe Weihnacht, and Happy New Year. Whichever holidays you’re celebrating, make them good ones.

And I hope that 2009 is even better for you than 2008.

Take care,

Jake